My Testimony – I have low self-esteem

joshua-fear-public-speaking1Before I stepped into church and know God, I was a person who struggled with low self-esteem. I was not confident of myself and the fear of approaching people was one of my greatest. I would always feel that the people around me were talking bad behind my back. Because I did not like to speak to people, I felt more comfortable talking to people behind the computer screen.

I remembered an incident during my secondary school days, when I was asked to stand and present my answers to the class. I was so nervous and afraid during the presentation and I perspired until my uniform was totally drenched. Needless to say, my friends made fun of me and I felt miserable.

However, in 2008, the turning point in my life came when I joined Church and got to know who God and Jesus is. I made a decision to commit myself to weekly cell group meetings and church services.  I started listening to sermons and slowly I grow to be more confident of who I am.

joshua-fear-public-speaking4The love of my cell group members and the discipleship given by my cell group leader help me to grow in my self-esteem.  Soon I also discovered the purpose that God has placed in my life. I experience visions and dreams and have the desire to serve God in a greater capacity.

joshua-fear-public-speaking3 Throughout my Christian walk, there were many ups and downs. I experienced parental objection to come to church, which caused much family tension. There were times when I had to struggle to meet ends meet and provide proper meals for myself. During this period, there were many times when I told God that I wanted to give up, but God’s word in Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”, encouraged me to keep on going.

Soon, blessings after blessings started to come. I broke free from my parental objection and my parents accepted the fact that I turned for the better after going to church. My mum attended my bible school graduation in church which was a huge breakthrough for me. The blessings did not stop. My relatives sold a shophouse left behind by my late grandmother for around  Sing$3million, and my dad received a share of it. Eventually my dad blessed me with the sum of money, and I no longer had to struggle with my finances. Praise the Lord!

All these would not have happened if God was not in my life. God has truly changed me from somebody with low self-esteem, to somebody who is bold enough to speak in public and make presentations. This year, I was also given a chance to preach in youth service and cell group when I went to Indonesia. It was challenging but I took a step of faith and believed God.

I learned how to play guitar and was given many chances to play on stage for hundreds of people as well.

joshua-fear-public-speakingI am still in the process of learning and I believe as i keep on trusting God, He will take me into my destiny that He has in placed for me. I am grateful to God for what He has done for me, and also all my church leaders and friends who have constantly sowed in my life. Without all these support and help, I would not be who I am today. Thank God!

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